Hours and hours went by causing grave concern and worry

[salenfl05]

Q: What did the Blonde do when her boyfriend was having a seizure in the bath tub?
A: She threw in a load of laundry.

Q: How do you kill a Blonde?
A: Put a scratch and sniff on the bottom of the pool.

Q: How do you kill a Blonde?
A: Put a mirror on the bottom of the pool.

Q: What is a Blondes definition of a naval destroyer?
A: A hula hoop with a nail in it.
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A Blonde, a Redhead and a Brunette were competing in the English Channel Breast Stroke Competition. The Redhead won and the Brunette came in second. However, there was no sign of the final contestant . Hours and hours went by causing grave concern and worry. Just as everyone was losing hope, the Blonde finally arrived. The crowd was extremely happy and relieved to see her. They embraced the young girl as she came ashore. After all of the excitement died down, she leaned over to the judge and whispered, "I hate to be a bad loser, but I think those other girls used their arms."

[salenfl05]

"As you exit the plane, please make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses."

"Last one off the plane must clean it."

And from the pilot during his welcome message: "We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry ...Unfortunately none of them are on this flight...!
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Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very hard landing in Salt Lake City: The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump and I know what ya'll are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendants' fault.....it was the asphalt!"

[salenfl05]

41) Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
42) Puritanism: The haunting fear that somewhere, someone may be happy. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
43) Isouport publik edekashun.
44) Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
45) There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.
46) Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
47) Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
48) If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.Bayern Munich Jersey
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49) A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
50) Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

[salenfl05]

The Duck

A man walks into a bar with a metal box under one arm and a duck under the other. The man walks up to the bar and asks the bar tender "if you give me a free bottle of beer I'll show you my dancing duck". The barman is surprised, but gives the guy a bud and asks the bloke to show him the duck dancing. So the guy puts the metal box on the bar, and stands the duck on top of it. A few seconds later the duck starts to jump around, as if he's doing an Irish jig.
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Everyone in the bar is now watching this duck dancing, and the barman offers the guy $50 for the duck and the box. The bloke accepts, and the pub is filled day and night for 3 days with people watching the amazing dancing duck.

So 3 days after he sold the barman the duck, the guy walks back in to the pub and sees his duck dancing on the box on top of the bar.

The barman sees the guy and offers him a bottle of bud on the house. As he gives the guy the bud, the barman asks, "Could you tell me how you stop the duck from dancing on top of the box?"

The man replies, "Oh that's easy, you just take the hot coals out."

[salenfl05]

A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"
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Vibram Five Fingers Classic Woman Shoes Lilac/white/Lilac Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl?
B: It's a girl. She's my daughter.
A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father.
B: I'm not. I'm her mother. Mother: "Did you enjoy your first day at school?"
Girl: "First day? Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?
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[salenfl05]

LAW 10: Sand is alive. If it isn't, how do you explain the way it works against you?

LAW 11: Golf carts always run out of juice at the farthest point from the clubhouse.

LAW 12: A golfer hitting into your group will always be bigger than anyone in your group. Likewise, a group you accidentally hit into will consist of a football player, a professional wrestler, a convicted murderer and an IRS agent -- or some similar combination.
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LAW 13: All 3-woods are domon-possessed.

LAW 14: Golf balls from the same "sleeve" tend to follow one another, particularly out of bounds or into the water (see Law three)

[salenfl05]

One day a Blonde buy's a home-made still for brewing liquor and was outraged when a surprise raid resulted in him being arrested. The judge explained that although they found no liquor they found the apparatus for brewing it and that was enough evidence. "You might as well convict me of rape then" yelled the Blonde. The judge explained that there was no evidence that he had raped anyone. "Yes" said the Blonde "but I've got the apparatus."
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One day a Blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead were caught behind enemy line's and where sentenced to death by the a firing squad. The leader yelled "READY ... AIM ..." and just then the Redhead yelled "Tornado!" and when they all turned around to look she ran away. So the leader started again "READY ... AIM ..." just then the Brunette yelled "Flood!" and ran away when they turned away to look. Next was the Blonde, and the leader started again "READY ... AIM ..." seeing the pattern the Blonde yelled out "Fire!"

[two0426]

You will probably need a warlock who can draw aggro (come 3.1, a destruction/demo hybrid should be very hard to kill yet a world of wow power leveling burst if left alone), and your killing spree is the nuke to finish people off to get cheap wow powerleveling.Tried AR/prep and I wow power leveling still do not like it. Hemo sklfjgnvw just does not do enough damage %?^%$?^%^%$^6gfgfd even with AR up, and your survivability outside of stuns is actually wow power leveling Wedding Dresses worse than mutilate/prep (deadened nerve + quick recovery makes ?$%^?GDFGDFG%$54? a big difference). Mobility is not that much better than wow power leveling Wedding Dresses mutilate/prep either. Mutilate/prep is probably still the most well-rounded spec, but I just do not believe it can compete with wow power leveling wow gold the top dogs about wow powerleveling. The peak potential of this spec is probably behind us and will never be reached again. Shadow wow power leveling wow gold dance took a hit on PTR with the nerf of backstab glyph (extend rupture duration, what hell?). I understand Blizzard is trying to tone down burst damage, but rogue burst damage is already 2nd tier, and our survivability is the worst among all DPS classes 0726lj.

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[salenfl05]

Jane was a first time contestant on the $65,000 quiz show. Lady luck had smiled in
her favor, as Jane had a gained substantial lead over her opponents. She even
managed to win the game but, unfortunately, time had run out before the show's host
could ask her the big question.

Jane agreed to return the following day. Jane was nervous as her husband drove
them home. "I've just gotta win tomorrow. I wish I knew what the answers are! You
know I'm not going to sleep at all tonight. I will probably look like garbage tomorrow.
"Relax honey," her husband, Roger, reassured her, "It will all be OK."
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Ten minutes after they arrived home, Roger grabbed the car keys and started
heading out the door. "Where are you going?" Jane asked. "I have a little errand to
run. I should be back soon."

[salenfl05]

Dear Abby, Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby, I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?

Dear Abby, My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy.

Dear Abby, I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby, My mother is mean and short tempered I think she is going through mental pause.
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Dear Abby, You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?